You have been happy with your partner for a while now but something is starting to feel wrong.
It’s the last thing you want to believe but you suspect he might be cheating on you.
How can you tell for sure without strapping a lie detector to him or hiring a private investigater?
Do you suspect your man might be cheating on you? How can you tell for sure without strapping a lie detector to him or hiring a private unvestigator? Three top psychologists and relationship experts share the 12 signs that signify he could be doing the dirty.
1. The usuall suspects: lipstick on his collar or clothes, unexpected marks indicative of sexual activity on his body, another woman’s scent on his clothes or hair. Especially if this happens more than once.
2. All of a sudden, his working days are longer, maybe he even has to travel, so he’s away from you overnight, for a couple of days at a time, or even longer. Especially when this is coupled with some of the other signs, there are clear pointers that he probably is playing away. The same holds true of sudden, increased lifestyle expenses(drinks, meals,hotels) that don’t include you.
3. He’s not present. Even when he’s physically present, he’s off in his own world, he’s not really there with you.
4. He takes a lot more trouble over his appearance, whether that means dressing better, a sudden heavy use of aftershave, or an infatuation with the gym and lifting weights, showering before coming to bed, which sometimes signifies guilt or the scent of a lover, is another clue. He may also be cleaning his car to remove any signs of another woman.
Even when he’s physically present, he’s off in his own world, he’s not really there with you. Is he using his phone a lot? This could also be a sign.
5. A new enthusiasm for a colleague at work, a newly single female, or even a friend of yours. Suddenly, he’s talking about her out. In fact, he’s almost over helpful! It feels like a crush, to you.
6. He stops noticing you. You could probably wear a bag over your head and he wouldn’t notic. Even when he ‘makes an effort’ to be with you, he doesn’t really notic you. My friend once told me she would stuck a strand of her long hair in the flame during a candle-lit dinner with her husband and he didn’t notice.
7. Hints and warnings from colleagues, friends and families. Chances are they have your best interests at heart, and they know something you don’t know.
8. Your intuition is screaming at you that he’s having an affair. You may not be able to substantiate what your intuition is saying, but that doesn’t stop it being true. Your intuition doesn’t have an agenda. It doesn’t want you to hold onto this man at all costs. It just tells you the truth thar it picks up from a thousand subtle clues.
9. His accusations that you are jealous and /or crazy. Attack is a cheater’s best form of defences. These are classic ploys for making you doubt yourself. Unless you are a habitually jealous person, you need to trust your gut.
10. Showing you his text messages and email accounts. An accomplished cheat will have a mobile that you will never even see which he uses for his other woman/women. The same goes for email accounts. As regards social media, unless he is an idiot, and/or wants you to find out, you probably won’t find any traces of cheating on his social media.
11. Are they suddenly being overly nice? Allowing you to watch whatever you want on TV, buying you gifts, asking if you would like to go out to your favourite restaurant. For some, having an affair can make them act happier in their life….or guilt can make them try to make it up to you subconsciously.
12. Maybe the opposite is true and they are constantly picking fault with you or accusing you of cheating. When attraction fades in a relationship and there’s something going on the side, it’s easy to get irritable. The added burden of deceit doesn’t help. Plus, once someone has successfully cheated undetected they start to think if they could do it why can’t you.
He stops noticing you, you probably wear a bag over your head and he wouldn’t notic. If he shows you his messages, that’s also a worrying sign.